The Report of my Death was an Exaggeration: How old fashioned hamburger magnate Wendy's prompted my return to blogging.

Okay.

So.

I haven't blogged in over two years. My bad.

In the interim since my last post, I finished my Masters degree, quit my secure, relatively high paying job for the much less secure and unpredictable, low paying job of substitute teaching which is currently on hold due to summer vacation and has been replaced by a job as pool bouncer. More on that in subsequent posts...if I don't drop off the face of the blog earth again. I've also moved 600 miles away from the state I was born and raised in to a state with much better climate, much nicer people, and much better pimento cheese. That last one was the biggest reason for moving.

So now that we're all caught up, it's time to get back to business. I've been toying around with the idea of blogging again for a few months, but for whatever reason, I just couldn't find the motivation to actually do it. Why? I'm lazy. That's pretty much it. I've had lots of blog posts rolling in my head, especially the last couple weeks, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It's not like I don't have the time. I have time in torrential downpours of abundance. I just wouldn't do it.

But you know what finally gave me the swift kick in the butt to get back at it? A Wendy's commercial.

Look at her. She looks all sweet and innocent and not like the greedy ginger that she is.

Here's the deal: I love me some Wendy's. Of the ginormous international fast food chains, I think Wendy's is the closest to producing an actual burger. That being said, we now live way out in the boonies, the closest Wendy's is about 25 minutes away and it's only on the way to other restaurants, so it has become a rare treat. A large part of my love for Wendy's developed when I was in college. I survived my college years on a steady diet of 99 cent Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers. Broke college student budget + el inexpensivo bacon cheeseburger = match made in heaven (it also = the notorious freshman 15...or 50). Recently, Hubby and I were at Wendy's on one of those rare treat occasions. Given the lengthy journey to our home in Mordor (no we don't live in an allegorical version of Hell [although it is close], I'm just trying to help you visualize the scale of our remoteness), the drive thru is not an option. The food gets cold before we get to eat it. Anyway, I noticed that the Junior Bacon Cheeseburger is no longer 99 cents, but is now $1.79. A freakin DOLLAR AND SEVENTY NINE CENTS!!!! That's a price increase of nearly 81% in about six years. At this rate, the JBC will be $5.79* in twelve years. I know that doesn't seem like a lot for a burger, but when you consider it hung out at 99 cents for probably more that twelve years, then it is.

So back to today. I'm sitting on my recliner with my laptop perusing Parenting in Crappy Pictures (which is hilarious, and you should check it out), a Wendy's commercial comes on whatever I'm not paying attention to on the TV, and I just happen to catch one part of it...the 99 cent four piece chicken nugget. That's four piece. It used to be five. I think this might tick me off more than the $1.79 JBC. You know why? Because they're trying to be sneaky about it. With the JBC, it's not like you can shrink it and pretend it's the same burger at the same price as it always was. But with quantifiable chicken nuggets, you can. Now, there will obviously be a lot of people that will notice it. That includes people like myself that lived off the 99 cent menu for years. BUT there will probably be more who don't notice it. They'll just see 99 cent chicken nuggets and think it's still a bargain. Forget that you're getting 20%* less food for the same price that you would have paid a few years ago, it's only 99 cents. Nothing's 99 cents these days! So I say, be outraged! Go to Wendy's and flip some tables in protest (Actually, don't do this. It might get you thrown in fast food jail or blacklisted or something).

All that to say that Wendy's's (With all my grammar knowledge, I don't know how to properly punctuate in this situation. It's the possessive of the proper noun "Wendy's.") supposed sneaky price gouging enraged me enough to finally return to blogging. I guess it's better than letting all this crap continue to roll around in my noggin.

So, here's hoping I actually stick with it for a while. I certainly have plenty to blog about regarding my absurdly awesome and yet still occasionally stressful summer job, my job search, and my learning experiences living in an entirely new region of the country.

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* - Yes, I can actually do math even though I'm a certified English teacher. I've actually always been very good at it. I've just forgotten most of it.